Saturday, November 28, 2009

From Kellie

Jai came into our lives when I advertised for a Remedial Massage Therapist to join our team in Brisbane. After him flying up for an interview I pretty much decided straight away that he was the right person to fill the position that I was offering. That decision turned out to be correct….our patients LOVED him! He had a rare ability to massage very deeply without causing TOO much pain. He seemed to feel his way into the deeper muscles and sensed exactly how much pressure to use for that particular patient for their particular problem. He also had the ability to work in silence, which patients really appreciated, as so many therapists feel the need for idle chatter which detracts from their patients massage experience.


There were more than a few ladies who developed quite a crush on Jai, most of whom were not his type, Bless him, but it was amusing to watch him handle all this unwanted attention! He did however always manage to diplomatically handle these awkward situations in a very professional manner. This attention was however quite profitable for him, as these eager female patients would return more and more for their massage sessions with him. They also often offered various social invitations to help him settle into Brisbane, however none of them were ever accepted. Instead he spent his free time going to the gym, training in Karate, visiting his Mum and Uncle, or going for solo bush walks. He climbed one of our highest mountains to be at the very top in time for sunrise. Most of us Queenslanders wouldn’t attempt that, not in our heat, but that didn’t stop Jai.

Jai was amazing with my son Zac… they had rough and tumble play that the two of them would thoroughly enjoy. He told me that he really was a big kid himself, and that he loved talking to kids because there was no need to make serious small talk. He could let his inner child out, play, and laugh, and have as much fun as the kids themselves. What a lovely trait. He would have made a great Dad.

When I fell pregnant and we found out we were going to have another little boy, Jai was delighted that we decided to call our little boy Jai. Yes, ‘Jai’ is a beautiful name, strong and masculine, but also for me, naming our boy after Jai also expressed my respect of ,and fondness for ,this special man. He would often check up on how I was going through my pregnancy “How’s little Jai going?”, and after little Jai was born he wrote “ Good job, a new and improved Jai in the world”. How sweet.

Then 3 weeks, to the day, after little Jai was born, our big Jai was gone. Like everyone who knew Jai, I was beyond shocked, I was, and am, devastated. Up until big Jai’s passing I had no trouble calling my little Jai by his name. But after big Jai’s passing, I find myself calling my little Jai with his middle name, “Jai Matthew” , as calling him just “Jai” makes me feel so sad, reminding me of big Jai who should still be with us all. This will pass in time, and I look forward to being able to call my little Jai by his first name alone, in memory of the amazing man he was named after.

We really miss you Jai, you were an inspiration to so many people. I hope little Jai will enjoy Karate when he is older, you never know, he may do your name proud.


2 comments:

  1. Hi Kellie. You might gather from posts I have made earlier that I was a friend of Jai's through karate. I have to comment though on your wonderful and admittedly tear creating post on your memory of Jai. Through posts such as yours, others and from Jai's family on this blogsite, I have come to know more about Jai's life outside of karate and the various facets and parts of his life which made up this extraordinary young man who in his own eyes would have considered himself merely ordinary. They also invariably highlight our great loss. Your has made me smile (I can imagine Jai trying to fend off the advances, so much so he probably thought it was much much easier to train karate and fend off those advancing with punches and kicks than female clients) and make me shed tears, bitter sweet as the saying goes.

    I hope you will be able to call your little boy "Jai" again soon and just remember the wonderful life and young man after whom he was named. One day your boy will be able to perhaps read this site himself and come to know about the man who's name inspired his. His memory remains alive through these memories and through the actions of all of us in remembering him.

    I read your post on 29 November, poignantly on the 1 month anniversary of his passing. My thoughts and prayers very much with Jai's family at this time. I continue to miss Jai dearly, both his presence in my life and the mere knowledge he is around somewhere ready to get together and "catch up" once again, as no doubt you and so many do. I continue to pray that his memory and living spirit fill the hole his passing has left. This blogsite is doing a good job in answering those prayers.

    All the best to you and your family.

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  2. Frankly that is one of the most moving tributes I have ever read. Meaningful and heartfelt.

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